Shiksa Goddess
by Disdain.in.the.membrane
Summary: Bebe and perfection come naturally. Kyle wishes he was as put together. The two bond and soon find themselves wrapped up in a world of their own.
1. Chapter 1

**Shiksa Goddess 1**

"I eat boys up, breakfast and lunch. Then when I'm thirsty I drink their bl-" Bebe reaches over and shuts off the Kesha song blaring out of her alarm. Sitting up, she scratched the back of her head and stretched. It was five in the morning. School didn't start until eight, but she always got a head start on her day. She was a very busy girl.

Stepping out of bed, Bebe turns on her television switching to the weather channel. She goes to the bathroom before walking right back in stepping onto her treadmill. The machine is just one of the perks of being an only child. And she has a room big enough to fit that along with her king sized bed. She warms-up with some walking before starting her stationary run. It's way too cold outside to enjoy a nice jog outside, and especially so early in the morning.

Five-fifty is the time she finally stops. She always gets in forty-five minutes worth of running into her morning before starting anything else. Bebe flips off the TV after hearing it's going to be the coldest it's been in months. Not something she's looking forward too because it does horrors to her hair and skin. She picks out her clothes, setting them aside on her bed, and starts up the shower.

The warm water hitting her skin makes her sigh out of relief. Twenty minutes go by and out she steps, cleaner and refreshed. She fixes her hair, blow drying it until her curls are the style she wants. Today she'll wear a headband. Going back into her room, Bebe looks down at the clothes on her bed. A simple pair of white jeans and a yellow sweater is what her wardrobe is today. She'll also be wearing her bright red snow coat and boots to fight her way to school. Looking the best she possibly can, however. She sits down at her mirror and takes her time putting make-up on. Simple for school, making it look like she didn't try looking perfect, spending half an hour covering up freckles. She finishes her morning prep with a spritz of perfume and putting on her rings. Bebe checks herself over in the mirror before heading downstairs for breakfast.

She turns on a pot of coffee for her parents and pulls out the blender to make a smoothie. And that is what usually wakes up her parents. However, this morning seems much quieter than usual. The pot of coffee is ready and neither her mother nor father has come downstairs to complain about the blender while grabbing a cup. Bebe waves it off, pouring her fruit smoothie into a glass. She walks into the living room and turns on the TV to the local news. It's not even seven yet so she has time to enjoy her breakfast.

It's also minutes before any signs of her parents are heard. Her mom is the first to come downstairs, looking a little worse for wear. Her usually perfect hair was disheveled and she had yet to change out of her pajamas.

"Yeesh, Mom, you feeling alright?" Bebe commented only to get a glare her way.

Her father came downstairs shortly after causing the atmosphere to become uncomfortable. What made Bebe's stomach drop, though, was the suitcase her dad hauled down with him.

"Uh," She managed to mumble out, "what's going on?"

Her father set down the luggage and took a seat next to her on the sofa. Reaching out, he brushed a fallen curl behind Bebe's ear, "My beautiful daughter," he almost whispered, "I'm sorry." He kissed her forehead.

Bebe let out a start of a laugh, stopping herself to say, "Dad, you're scaring me."

"I'm so sorry," He repeated into her hair. "Listen," He pulled away, "if you need me just call. I'm going out for a while."

Tears began to form in her eyes. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. This had to be all her mom's fault. They were arguing pretty bad last night, but Bebe didn't think it was enough for him to just leave like this.

"For how long?" She choked out.

Her dad pulled her into a hug, stroking her back, "Sweetheart, I'm sorry, okay?" And with that he stood up, grabbing his luggage he headed for the door.

Bebe quickly took after him, "Dad, I made coffee." Her words were shaky, on the brink of falling apart. But she wasn't going to she was stronger than that.

He paused, holding his hand above the doorknob, "I love you, beautiful," he said before opening up the door.

And with that he was gone.

Bebe stood in front of the now closed door, still fighting away tears. This wasn't happening. It was just a dream. But it all felt too real. And it was real.

She headed for the kitchen where her mom sat at the table with her mug of coffee in her hands. "How could you let that happen?" Bebe demanded.

Her mom sighed, standing up to walk to the cupboard. She pulled out a bottle of bourbon and poured a gracious amount into her coffee. "Don't snap at me," she finally said as she sat down.

Frustrated, Bebe knocked her mother's coffee mug off of the table making it crash onto the floor. "What did you do?"

Rubbing her hand through her bleached blonde hair, her mom stood back up, "Me? Why the hell are you blaming me?" Her volume increased with each word, "Now let me tell you that sometimes things happen. It's not my fault!" Tears escaped from her eyes, but she turned her head away so Bebe wouldn't see. "Clean up the mess," She finished, leaving to go back upstairs.

And she left Bebe to clean up the shattered mug off of the floor. Holding back tears in order to not ruin her make-up; she wasn't going to let this get to her. Because she was a very busy girl.

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**This is the start of a fairly short story. Because I have things to do, so what better way to avoid them than write fanfiction. Great idea. **

**Anyway this will be KyBe because I think they are adorable. **

**And I hope you like it.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Shiksa Goddess 2**

By seven-fifteen Bebe has the coffee cleaned up off of the floor and leaves. She gets into her mom's car (she had to wait until graduation for her own) and takes a moment to recap while the white mom van warmed up. She ran her glove-fitted hands down the steering wheel, sighing to herself. Plugging in her iPod, she dug through her music before falling onto a song and letting it blast through the speakers. She was allowing herself two minutes to get her composure back together.

Those two minutes weren't enough, but she forced any bad thoughts down and drove off towards Wendy's house. It doesn't take long to get there, so by seven-twenty-five she is parked outside of her best friend's house. She hops out of the car and rushes to the door and, knowing that it is unlocked just for her, she lets herself in. She greets Wendy's mom who is standing in front of the mirror putting on her earrings. In return she gets a cheery greeting back, but even that seems like too much now.

Wendy walks downstairs and smiles at her friend. But she quickly sees the off expression on Bebe's face and asks, "Are you okay?"

Bebe mindlessly plays with one of her curls, "Yeah," she mentally curses herself for sounding so weak, "rough morning."

Wendy rolls her eyes, "Tell me about it. Are you ready?"

Before Wendy runs out the door her mom stops her, "Did you eat breakfast?"

"Yes, Mother."

They say their byes to each other and leave the house before Bebe speaks up, "You really shouldn't lie to her like that."

Wendy tossed her bag onto the car floor, "We have nothing but junk at the house."

Bebe reached over to her bag and pulled out a thermos and an apple, "You just know I'll take care of you."

"And make the best coffee."

The interaction lifts Bebe's spirits a bit. When the girls get to school the parking lot is already full of students hanging around. Bebe parks next to a beaten old green jeep. She does so on a daily basis because it makes the fact that she drives her mother's van not such a terrible thing. Wendy takes no time to jump out excitedly, giving a small wave, and rushing over to where Token just pulled up. Bebe laughs to herself watching her petite friend wrap her arms around him. But something about the intimate action breaks her heart, and brings back those ugly feelings she had thought she forced down.

A car horn jumps her out of her thoughts. It's Red, of course, stepping out of Stan's car. And Bebe decides it's best to not think too much about relationships today. It only makes everything that happened not too long ago hurt much worse. So she steps out of the car and starts her day.

All of her morning classes seem to drag along. She has a test first thing in the morning in English, which she aces, and the rest of the classes consist of discussion. She has all of her core classes first thing in the morning, all advanced classes. She impatiently waits for the bell to ring for lunch so she can get away from the annoying amounts of work she seems to be getting. At lunch she sits with the cheerleading squad, not out of stereotypical clique ideas, but due to the fact that most of her friends tried out and got onto the squad once they entered high school. The friends she has been with since elementary school. Sure, a few have drifted, but some stayed around long enough to make it to their senior year still friends. So many years have gone by. And how long until no one is talking again? How long until somebody leaves?

She stops herself from thinking.

Her lunch time is her time to let herself go. She lets herself be brought into the lighthearted feel of friendship. All the laughter and gossip is enough to make her feel okay.

After lunch is gym class. And despite the cold the class is expected to run a mile on the track. With everyone stretching, Bebe takes notice of Kyle Broflovski. She always takes notice of the red headed boy. It's just because she always sees him at the start of class, but he is nowhere to be found once class is over. She watches him do the familiar stretches he has learned from years on the track team before catching herself with her mouth open.

The coach blows his whistle and everyone begins running. Bebe stays only a few feet behind Kyle, at first unknowingly but soon finds herself keeping up with him. He is much faster than she is, his long legs taking him much further along. After their first lap she notices Kyle glance around a bit, which makes her slow down. Bebe watches him run straight off of the track and behind the bleachers.

The bastard is ditching class.

Bebe checks for any signs of the coach before following behind Kyle. He keeps on jogging, slowing down as he enters the small wooded trail by the school. She walks quietly behind him, keeping her distance to not be found out. It's only a short walk before Kyle drops down to the ground. Bebe rushes up, thinking that he tripped, only to find him sitting on the cold ground in front of a dog. The dog takes notice and begins to bark at her. Kyle turns around and Bebe knows she is caught, and doesn't try to hide it.

They have a short lived staring contest before Kyle turns back to the dog, rubbing the back of its ears. "I guess we've been found out." The dog whined in response, licking the palm of his hand.

The dog itself is medium sized. Brown, with a black spot around it's ear. It looks domesticated enough, so it's surprising that the poor thing would be out in the cold as it is now. Everyone seems to be getting thrown away lately.

Bebe inches up to the two, bending down to pet the dog, "I won't tell." She feels Kyle's eyes on her and takes a quick glance only to have him turn his head away, "You really shouldn't skip class. Someone will notice."

"If the teacher isn't there then I don't have to be either," He doesn't hide the annoyance in his voice.

Bebe takes the conscious decision to sit down, "So, what do you do here?"

Kyle reaches into his sweater's pocket, pulling out a small bag of assorted meats. She watches him open it and piece by piece feed it to the dog. "Good girl," Kyle coos.

Bebe smiles, leaning towards Kyle for warmth, but pulls away once she feels him stiffen next to her. "Sorry," She says.

"Don't be. You just surprised me," Bebe looked up at Kyle to find him smiling down at her. "It's not like we talk or anything."

"Yeah, what happened to that?" Bebe found herself thinking back to the morning's events.

"I wonder," Kyle almost whispered. "Hey," He excitedly turned to her, "you want to ditch with me tomorrow too?"

"Why?"

"Think of it as paying you back for not being a douche and telling on me."

Bebe couldn't resist the cheeky grin Kyle had on his face. It gave her a nice bubbly feeling inside of her stomach.

"Plus," Kyle continued, "Ingrid and I get lonely sometimes."

At first Bebe was confused, but then she saw Kyle place a hand on the dog's head. The kind gesture made her feel like crying. She felt like she was intruding on his sacred place, and he was allowing her to. Fighting away tears, she nodded.

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**Look I made a thingy. Gracias for the reviews and follows and all that jazz. **

**I should really be studying for a million things right now...**


	3. Chapter 3

**Shiksa Goddess** **3**

The company Kyle wanted was brought to him days following his interaction with Bebe. They skipped gym on a daily basis, running and laughing into the woods making a game out of it all. And Ingrid, the mutt, would meet up with them every day in hopes of treats she knew she would get. Bebe and Kyle would only talk on their time spent in the woods. Nothing important was ever discussed it was mainly just a simple interaction between two people that wanted to reconnect a lost friendship.

They jumped back into the friendship fairly easily. It was a simple bond, just two lonely kids wanting company. They learned about each others lives, and plans beyond the South Park boarder. Laughed over stories about friends, stupid times where they almost got into trouble. But one line Bebe made sure to never cross was family, love, and relationships. Those were trouble. They meant sudden death at the spot.

But after weeks of talking Bebe began to feel nervous about meeting with Kyle. She would get excited knowing that they would get to talk freely for an hour. And when she was with him she was put at ease. She was able to feel invincible. And she hated every second of it. Because she was falling into, not a sudden death as she had previously thought, but a slow, painfully beautiful death. She was aware of every movement she made with him, and every interaction that they shared. On few occasions they texted, and even then she was cautious about what she would send. Not wanting to cross the line beyond friendship. It was all moving so fast. And even though she hated it that didn't stop her from allowing it to happen.

It was almost winter break, and the weather was showing it with snow falling like crazy. The two huddled together at the back of the school along with Ingrid who excitedly wagged her tale between them. Their winter exercise wear was barely enough to keep warm in the freezing temperatures. But neither one seemed to mind.

Bebe could feel Kyle's body heat against her and it brought comfort throughout her body. She let her eyes close as he ranted over a heated debate he had earlier with Cartman. She let her mind imagine his thin lips moving even though she could easily watch him talk. She smiled, bringing her hands into the pocket of her sweater. And before her mind had time to register what was happening the words already slipped out.

"I like you," She said.

Kyle stopped mid-sentence, silence falling between the pair. Bebe had yet to open her eyes, in fear of the reality she had created. She crossed the line, but she hadn't died yet.

Finally, Kyle broke the silence, "What?"

Bebe sighed, opening up her eyes to the harsh winter weather that lay before her, "Never mind," she pulled her hands out of her sweater's pocket, "this is stupid." She turned to leave knowing the bell would ring any minute now.

Kyle stopped her, gently tugging on her sleeve, "Nothing you say is stupid." Bebe turned back around to face him, "You like me?"

Bebe nodded, suddenly feeling vulnerable under the pressure. She shook off the momentary weakness and looked back up to the red head in front of her. Her brown eyes met with his green ones before she mentally traced over his features. His freckled face, acne scars beginning to fade away along his cheeks. His nose was sharp and slightly crooked, and he pinched his eyebrows together out of confusion. Then her eyes met with his lips, his top lip slightly bigger than the bottom. Imperfection was perfect on him. From his curly red hair that was usually hidden away with a hat to his torn up boots that he wore even when they didn't match. He had no style sense whatsoever. And Bebe liked every bit of it. She liked every bit of him.

"I like you," She repeated with confidence.

Kyle's face was already red from the cold, but it somehow managed to darken. He had released his hand from her sleeve and stood in shock. It made Bebe uncomfortable in the awkward silence. Ingrid whined between the two for attention to which Bebe bent down to give her some much needed love. In the distance they could hear the school bell ring signaling the end of class.

"Well," Bebe stood back up, "I'm heading back to class."

This seemed to snap Kyle out of his daze. He looked straight passed Bebe, staring at a nearby oak tree, "I like you too," He almost screamed.

It started off with a giggle and ended with Bebe bent over in laughter. The most laughter she has been able to manage in a long while. "You," She tried catching her breath, "you have the straightest face." She straightened herself out, brushing away tears from the laughter.

Kyle pouted; he didn't expect to get laughed at. Especially for his serious face at that matter.

Bebe stepped closer to Kyle. She was feeling warmer than she probably should have in the snow. Her mind was racing, and her heart was pounding so hard she heard it in her ears. But that didn't mean she was going to back down. Oh no, she was going in for sudden death. She stood on her toes and placed her lips against his. And she felt his arms wrap around her waist.

Oh, was sudden death sweet.

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**Wow, am I having trouble with this story. I feel like I'm moving too fast so I had to separate some junk. ****Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and story.**

**Oh! And I never explained the title. Shiksa Goddess is a song from the musical The Last 5 Years. And just listen to it. It's really cute.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Shiksa Goddess 4**

Keeping a secret is like playing a game where all the rules are precise, and one misstep will end you back into the dog pound. Some secrets should never be heard. But some secrets shouldn't be hidden from the world. But in this game of secrets, so delicately displayed, each person holds onto their piece praying that it doesn't drop.

Bebe awoke to the sound of her Kesha alarm clock, as she did every weekday morning. Except this morning was different for today was December twenty-fifth, Christmas day, the most joyful season of the year. Or it was supposed to be. Ever since her father had walked out, Bebe had rarely seen her mom. Bebe's mother had taken a liking to her room as the days passed. It got to the point where she was forced to check on her to make sure her mother was eating enough. The house had become cold, when it used to be so warm during the harsh winter holiday. What once was a wonderful, family-oriented day had become such a dull and depressing thing that was wished to be undone.

Her mother was in hiding from the town. That was all she cared about though, her reputation. She wanted the town to think that she was on vacation with her husband. Her daughter could take care of herself (of course she could with the money from her father was sending her). Everything was going downhill since Bebe's father had left. Everything except Kyle.

Kyle had lifted Bebe's spirits. He was there and he made sure that she was happy. Ever since that kissbehind the school she had managed to let go. And she let him in. But no further than the front steps of her house. She always managed to get rid of him before inviting him into her home.

Home. That would be something she would enjoy coming back to. But this, this was no home. This was a prison. The days that she counted until she could be set free were falling short. She would be free once graduation hit. But until then she was stuck in this constant lie. No father, no mother, no home. She was just left with the small hope that maybe she might be able to escape this shit town. The town where nothing makes sense. Not even the people she could fall in love with.

Not in love. No. There was no such thing as love.

But then why was it that Kyle was standing at her front door, in such horrible weather? And why did his ugly, green car sit outside of her house consuming all the space it managed? And could somebody tell her why this Jewish boy was holding a Christmas gift in his hands for her?

She didn't have an answer.

In his hands Kyle held a square box, wrapped in colorful paper fit for the holiday. Whether that was his personal taste or the only wrapping paper he owned, though, was questionable. Bebe held her hands out, reaching for the present with haste, "thanks," on her part. She thought about closing the door, but that just didn't seem right, especially after such a nice gesture on his part. Hesitantly, Bebe invited Kyle into her house.

As he entered the house he looked around, taking in the wall decorations and bookshelf that sat at the entrance. Bebe led the way and Kyle took in his surroundings of family pictures and paintings by nobodies trying to be something. Bebe had set up a few Christmas decorations in hopes of bringing out her mother, but to no avail. She cautiously watched Kyle take a seat on the leather couch before sitting down next to him.

"Merry Christmas," He smiled at her, placing a kiss on her cheek.

"Happy Chanukah," She phrased as a question, a little unsure of his traditions.

Kyle blew it off and pointed to the gift in Bebe's hands, "You gonna open it?" He asked.

Bebe smiled, looking down at the gift. She pulled away at the paper and lifted the top to the box. Lying inside were white gloves, simple enough to go with almost every outfit she owned. "These are amazing," Her smile widened.

Kyle removed his hat displaying his bright red hair, "I hope they're alright."

Bebe gave him a peck on the lips, "I love them."

Kyle looked around the living room, "I heard your parents were on vacation."

The game of secrets.

"Yeah," Bebe smiled as she let the lie slip through her lips, "they've always wanted to go to Caribbean". It was all about her image. Perfect little stories that her mother trained into her head, and she allowed herself to get caught up in all of them.

"And you're here," He paused, suddenly looking uncomfortable, "alone?"

"I still have to clean up the house a bit, but I'm going over to Wendy's for dinner." Bebe kept a smile on her face. How easy this secret game was.

"Well," Kyle forced out, "your house is plenty clean so just come over to my place for a bit. It's really quiet in here and it's Christmas."

Bebe looked at one of the picture frames of her family, in the background a Christmas Carol could be heard, and she smiled, "I would like that."

Secrets, they can destroy everyone. But Bebe wasn't going to let them destroy her. She wanted to enjoy herself, and if her mother was going to mope around in the house on such a family-oriented holiday then so be it. She would do so. And she did. She was greeted into the Brofloski home with warmth and comfort. They were caring and considerate, but most of all loud. Bebe couldn't help herself from laughing along with them.

As the day soon became night she made an excuse to stay at the house. She didn't want to leave. But by midnight she was dropped off at her house, standing alone in all of its dark glory. She kissed Kyle goodbye and made her way upstairs to check on her mother. Her secret. She knocked on the door before opening it. But what stood in the middle wasn't a sight she wanted to see.

Christmas day, a family-oriented holiday. And she had left her only family member alone. There she was hanging from a rope, dressed in her Sunday best. Her mother. The woman that gave birth to her. The woman that raised her to be the strong woman she was today. How weak she looked now. How fragile. How…

Alone.

She was alone.

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**Wow. Okay. Totally not the original path I was going to take but spur of the moment I did it. And it happened. And I don't know where this story is headed. But stick through the shit plot and writing and maybe we'll end up at a good place. **

**Anyway thank you for the favorites, likes, and comments. I enjoy em all. And hugs and kisses for those putting up with this. I love you all. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Shiksa Goddess 5**

Long hair pulled up neatly into a bun, nails with intricately painted on designs, and make-up. And a simple white dress with matching white heels that all come together on a single being. Mother. A memory of someone so broken. A forced laugh. Act natural. Be perfect. Oh, what words they were so strict on the tongue. Words she will never hear in that voice again.

The longing for a comforting pat on the head, one that meant a hug was soon to come. A father who was not natural enough, too stressed from the harsh reality of it all. He was the idea of comfort, the body of love. And now it was all gone.

A memory.

All Bebe was left with now were the sirens, the voices, and the eyes. So many eyes. Why were they so concerned? Didn't they have families? There were so many voices, whispers. All wondering what had happened. All being too damn noisy.

Bebe looked up and was now face to face with Wendy who had made her way through the crowd. She brushed a curl away from Bebe's forehead and said words Bebe couldn't make out. Bebe could tell Wendy was shaken up, she was in tears. She reached up and brushed her best friend's tears away. Pulling her into a hug she saw the crowd of people. The eyes. Everything seemed to be moving so slow. The crowd, the voices, the noise. All moving so slow. Until everything went black.

A vision, foggy and outdated, appeared. Bebe was off in the distance watching a younger version of herself standing on top of the couch.

"I," Her voice rang loudly with no fear, "declare you my servant," she pointed to her mother, "and you my king," she said to her father.

"Can't I be the jester," Her mother played along with the child's game.

"Oh," Her father smiled, "You're just jealous I get to be king."

Bebe laughed at her younger self while the scene changed. A vase was knocked onto the floor and her mother was crying, yelling at young Bebe over the broken vase. Her younger self was crying. Her father walked into the room and her mother went on in rage over what had happened. He sighed to himself and walked over to Bebe who was crying next to the damage.

"Hey, beautiful," He pushed her frizzy blonde hair behind her ears, "why don't you go up to your room so I can clean this up. We don't want you to get hurt now, do we?"

Her mother stomped away, mumbling to herself as her father lifted young Bebe to her feet.

"You're not in any trouble, sweetie," He told her, pulling her into a hug.

The image of her father's face slowly faded into darkness, but the feeling of having her forehead stroked remained. Unfamiliar noises were heard in the background before Bebe opened her eyes.

"Dad?"

The first voice she could make out wasn't her father's, it was Wendy, "You scared me, Bebe!" But she wasn't the one touching her hair.

Bebe looked up to see Kyle and in return he said, "Hey, you passed out there."

"Where am I?" Bebe asked.

"Hell's Pass," Wendy answered, "You kind of freaked everyone out there."

"And," The image of her mom crying and screaming came into her mind, "Mom?"

Wendy grabbed her best friend's hand, "She's," she choked out unable to finish her sentence.

Bebe nodded slowly in response.

Wendy cleared her throat, "You will be staying with me for now, and don't question it Missy." She forced out a smile.

"Okay."

"I'm going to tell my mom you're awake," Wendy said with a reassuring squeeze to the hand before getting up.

Bebe watched her walk away before turning back to Kyle.

"Are you," He was still stroking her hair, "okay?"

"You're my king," Bebe almost whispered.

Kyle's smile was sad as he nodded and said, "Sure, but what does that make Ingrid?"

Bebe took no time to answer, "The jester."

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**Okay. Wow. Pointless short chapter. Gracias for the reviews and stuff because I have no idea where this story is headed, so if you want to throw out ideas then just tell me. It's a free for all and can end any way at this point. I still haven't decided if I want a sad, happy, or bittersweet ending.**

**What I do know is how I want Bebe's character to be and how she's going to change. ****Anyways, thank you very very much and the next chapter should be up after I finish the piles of work I'm currently avoiding.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Shiksa Goddess 6**

They say that each time you remember something you change a small detail. So that memory becomes less of the truth each time you think about it. But that doesn't stop the reality. It is still the same memory with all the same smells, sights, and sounds. It just becomes a little foggier to the mind.

That wasn't the case when Bebe entered her house for the first time in over a week. It was the new year and after spending time with Wendy and her family she felt it was okay to go back home before school started again. They had helped her with so much of the funeral planning, and had no trouble inviting her to stay after Bebe told them the truth about her parents. But she could not do that to them. She had to start taking care of herself. She applied for all the jobs she could think of and had luckily gotten one at Tweek Bros. That gave her a little backbone for upcoming bills. She would just have to manage her time and money wisely if she were to be her only provider.

She walked into the cold house, expecting something to be different. But nothing had changed. The pictures were still on the walls, and the present Kyle had gotten her was still sitting on the coffee table. Bebe set down her keys and walked up the stairs, tracing the wall with her fingertips as she went. She turned on the heater before going into her room. Tossing down her bag full of unwashed clothes, she went straight for her bed. And before she knew it she passed out.

Bebe woke up at five in the morning and started her usual routine. She exercised and showered all before leaving to pick up Wendy. At the house Wendy's mother asked again if Bebe wanted to live with them, and again Bebe refused.

At school people didn't talk to her. They talked about her, just not directly to her. The small town had found a topic and rumors began to spread. Wendy had walked next to her and fought off the stares up until Kyle walked up. He grabbed her by the hand and walked through the hallways leading her to the back of the school.

"The King demands to know why the Queen is at the hell-hold today," Kyle attempted to make his voice deeper.

Bebe smirked at him, "If they want to talk then let them talk." She walked back into the direction of the school.

Kyle sighed, stopping her from entering the school, "Bebe, it's okay to take some time off."

"Kyle," she mocked back, "I'm fine. Now let me get to class before I'm late."

"I didn't ask you if you were fine, but yeah, get to class." Kyle looked down at the snow.

Bebe went up to kiss his cheek, "You were asking, so trust me. I am okay."

They smiled at each other, both a little unsure about the other. But they let those feelings go in order to get to class.

The entire day was spent with people avoiding Bebe. Wendy had told her to ignore them, but when Red and a few other friends purposely sat away from her then she knew it was troublesome. She made an attempt to continue her day, but each passing hour just made her increasingly exhausted. By cheerleading practice she felt worn down, but continued to lead the team in whatever the coach wanted. Everything felt so menial. Is this how her mother felt in her final days?

After practice she went straight to work. Tweek taught her how to work the machines, and pointed out the usual customers. She went through training easily enough that they let her make her first drink for a customer. And since it wasn't a busy day she got to go home early. But she still felt as if something were missing.

She got home early enough to finish her homework before falling asleep on the couch. And in those few moments before her mind finally turned off for the night she remembered that she hadn't eaten yet. Too tired to care she drifted off to the sound of the news.

School the next day was easier. Bebe had gotten a feel for her schedule enough to get through the day. And she still got a break at gym class to run off with Kyle. Just like the previous day, though, the couple sat in silence with Ingrid, their jester. She entertained the two with her canine antics and kept them company in the cold. The week went on and Bebe grew increasingly tired. She could only manage so much at a time, and it was all catching up to her too fast.

On Friday Bebe and Kyle ran off to the woods, laughing to themselves along the way. They stopped at the usual spot where they met Ingrid, but she wasn't there. The two wandered further through the trees and snow looking for signs of the dog. Bebe walked ahead of Kyle, leaving a good distance between them. She was about to give up until she found a tuft of hair hidden behind a fallen tree. Cautiously, Bebe approached the still form to get a full view. She dropped to her knees at what she found. Shakily, she bent over to get a closer look.

Behind her, Kyle approached, slowing down when he saw her. "Bebe," He looked at her in confusion.

And then he saw it. He saw Ingrid. In all of her jester glory she was lying underneath a log, keeping shelter for herself and three newborn puppies.

Kyle kneeled down next to Bebe to get a better view. "Wow, I thought she was getting fatter," He stated as he watched Ingrid clean her newborn pups.

Bebe slowly nodded and opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She stared at Ingrid, her jester, as a mother. The dog that would jump up and down and beg for food was sitting so calmly in the comfort of the snow. Because even though it was cold, she still had company.

Again, Bebe opened her mouth to say something, but the only thing that escaped was a choked cry. And this time she didn't fight it back. She allowed herself to let go in the presence of her king and her jester. Bebe cried. She cried loud enough to get Ingrid to worry about her. She cried loud enough for Kyle to pull her into a hug in hopes of comforting her. Minutes later Bebe finally spoke up.

"My," She said through sobs, "my dad left."

Kyle stroked her hair whispering to her words of reassurance as she continued.

"I don't have a mom," Her cries grew stronger. "It's so lonely. I hate it," Her voice increased with each word, "I hate it. I hate it. I hate it!"

Kyle continued to cradle her in his arms. He let her cry and let everything out.

"I'm not okay," She cried into his chest.

* * *

**I feel like crying so I made Bebe cry finally. I felt she needed it. **

**Ugh. I have the worst writer's block right now. Thank you for the reviews though and I will take your suggestion into thought, CartmanMustDie. That is the cutest thing ever.**

**Anyway gracias for reading. I should have a few more chapters to pop out. I don't want this being a super long story. It was supposed to be like 3 chapters and look at this. I'm laughing because I actually like writing this story. So suggestions and whatever you want to see you can send to me because I enjoy that.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Shiksa Goddess 7**

A dry mouth, pain in her knee, and an even worse pain in her head were all the things Bebe could feel before even opening her eyes. She knew once she sat up that every bone in her body would ache from sleeping on the couch. And she could already feel the nausea bubbling up in the pit of her stomach. Slowly, she sat up not wanting to cause any more damage to her already beaten up body. She opened her eyes and did everything in her power to avoid the sunlight coming in from the window. Bebe stumbled into the kitchen and poured a glass of cold water. Leaning against the fridge, she slid to the ground.

Everything from the previous night was a blur. She remembered going to Clyde's house. She remembered losing Kyle in the crowd of reckless teenagers and smoke. And she remembered stumbling out of Kenny's beat up truck mumbling some half-hearted thank you.

Looking down at her knee she saw the beginnings of a bruise, all swollen and discolored. Staring at the nicked skin in the center of the bruise came the faint memory of falling onto something. Bebe chose not to think about it because the last three months had been a wreck. Ever since she broke down in front of Kyle, showing how not so perfect she was Bebe slowly felt her life falling apart. Even though she just found out about her full ride to the college of her choice, and even though she still had Kyle and Wendy and a select few who looked out for her she still felt messed up. But she wasn't going to admit that. And if that meant surrounding herself with wild parties full of drugs and alcohol then so be it. She had partied more in the past few months than she had in her party days freshman year. Anything to keep away the feeling of being alone.

But she was still alone.

All alone, the girl in red sitting on her kitchen floor in the outfit from the night before. All alone, the girl with the curls, frizzy from a night of heavy drinking and dancing. The girl all alone. She was left behind by her father and mother, and all the family and friends that could have been. And it was all in hopes of making her stronger, but only it left her with nothing within. A sob story that she wasn't ready to whine about for maybe this was the beginning. The prelude to the harsh life ahead.

From her bra she felt her phone vibrate jumping her out of her head. She scrolled through the missed texts from her boyfriend and her best friend. The one's from Wendy were all angry, annoyed with whatever Bebe did last night. But Kyle only sent concerned texts making everything seem alright.

Bebe rubbed the sleep out of her eyes not caring about the already severely smeared make-up that now took up the right side of her face. She sent a text to both Kyle and Wendy saying that she was okay.

After letting the nausea subside she got up to take a much needed shower, skipping out on her workout. She was already going to be late to school because partying on a Thursday night was the smartest decision.

But Bebe hasn't been in the greatest of moods for smart decisions. Sleep deprivation seeps through her, and she is still hungover. Her body aches from working too much, and every inch of her mind is racing with bad thoughts. All thoughts about trying to escape the work, leaving all the hardships behind. To live a life as a vagabond with no money, with only stories. But the freelancer lifestyle was never something she could do. Bebe has always stayed true to her code of hard work and fitting into the lifestyle society wants her to be.

And besides what is losing a few friends in high school going to do? What's losing a mother? What's losing a father? They are all but possessions that are acquired to become the perfect human being. And Bebe is an adult, old enough to take care of herself.

Right?

Bebe got out of the shower and got dressed with a few minutes left to put on make-up. She grabbed her bag before opening the front door. But on the other side of the door wasn't someone she was expecting to see.

There, in a button-up and slacks and now greying hair stood her father. He looked up at her, nervously pushing his glasses up, and almost whispered, "Hey."

* * *

**Finals are kicking my butt right now, but here's some poop I spilled out. Now the real question is if her father coming back is good or bad? And what happened with the puppies? And why all the partying?**

**Well the partying is more of a lonely thing that I stole from personal experience. A form of self-destruction through outlets not healthy in large doses. **

**Anyway thank you, lovelies.**


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